Great Way to Keep Up

So now it's almost my birthday, and about all I can think of is that the most memorable birthday I've had since the mess that happened on my birthday (9/11 lives on in infamy) was in '02 when Kirkie came to play for the day... there was a guy who knew how to play, and how to make love and bring lovely presents. I think he taught me how to play. I don't think I had a real 'playmate' in my adult years until I found him and he was a lot of fun... I miss him. This birthday will be fun, though, as Whitney and I are going to Callistoga to the lovely hot pools and nice massages. Roman Spa I think it is called. I'm all for that and can't wait. Wish K and I could have gone up to Callistoga... it's his kind of place.

Now what have I been doing in all these long months since last December? Getting old, I suppose. I know that for the first time in my life I really FEEL OLD. My back is killing me (ah, the Whitney back!) and my balance is off completely. Nothing like staggering around being held up by a walker. God I hate this time of really finally almost 'growing up' and suddenly become almost a helpless child. Most of all, I rather dislike the attitude of most people who surround me... sometimes being treated like a three year old... having the speaker treat one like a three year old, and then having them insist that they will 'help you.' I do not WANT help... I am more of an adult than they are. I absolutely LOVE people who understand... I adore Bill Ayres for something he did. I was at a writer's group meeting and said, "Well, I am very old, but I still..." and Bill broke in with, "Oh, Peg, you're not OLD." Bill is great... he talks to my mind, not my helpless body, and never treats me like a three year old. I have a couple of friends left who treat me like a contemporary, in spite of the fact that they are anything from 10 to 30 or 40 years younger than I. I recently had a lovely conversation about our past sex lives with a 35 year old guy, discovering that men don't change much, but enjoy the same things at 30 and 60 and I guess for the rest of their lives.

And now I shall close, having said not very much. God, even my hands are looking old... and they have always been my best feature. Ah, but I have discovered eBay and the fact that one can get rings to fit large (I refuse to say 'fat') fingers, so I do have a large set of lovely rings and bracelets... most in purple (amethyst) my color. Now when I show up at a meeting or a party, I show up! Ah, well, back to the PBS mysteries, I suppose. I'm not too impressed with "Silk"... but then, I have never liked lawyers... English or American, they are bloody bores. Now soccer players... I have just discovered them... wow! Bill may just be right... Peg, you're not OLD.