I think I have just been told goodbye by K. I shall miss him...nine years of almost constant communication is hard to forget about, particularly with someone whose mind seemed to run on the same track as one's own. I'll probably never again know anyone to whom I say, "me too, me too" constantly, and get it back again constantly. Sad times, goodbye times. But I really have to see a face to believe what is said. A look... body language, all that, all necessary really to believe it's true. That, unfortunately will not happen, for it cannot. Sad.
But I guess best thing to do is accept it, so I have written a poem, as usual. Friend Erna from my poetry group also felt a great loss, and feels it is one of my best... I don't know, I can't judge anything this new. Maybe years from now I can look back and judge... if I last that long.
You
You are not my happiness
You are not the center of my life
For I have found contentment
Of a sort.
You may still live within me
In that confined, crowded space
With others I have loved
In my heart.
You cannot push them out
Anymore than I can toss you out
So learn to live with them
As I have.
For life goes on for me now
And even without you I can live
As if you had never been
My only love.
Isn’t it amazing that you fade
Into the clouds of my past
And might even disappear
From my life.
Confined with all the others
In that tiny, over-crowded place
Full of forgotten memories
That is my heart.
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